ROLE MODEL: Robin Williams’ strong character in Dead Poets Society is too hard an act to follow for many dads.  Source: The Sunday Mail (Qld)

CALLING all good men. We need you. The role of fathers is often undersold in a culture where women, despite trends towards stay-at-home dads and go-to-work mums, are still the primary caregivers.

It’s women who are generally expected to nurture, to listen, to comfort and, increasingly, to discipline because men who grew up in homes where punishment was meted out by a belt can be unsure how to teach kids a lesson any other way.

As women become more independent and self-sufficient, the danger is that men are left wondering how they fit into the equation.

Far from being redundant, however, good men have never been more important, particularly in the lives of boys.

Single mothers of sons may not like to hear this, but the most important parent is the same-sex parent, says adolescent psychologist Dr Michael Carr-Gregg.

This doesn’t mean dads don’t influence their daughters (a girl’s relationship with her father sets the tone for interactions with other males) but that boys instinctively imitate their dads.

This is wonderfully reassuring when dad is around and is warm, attentive, stable and responsible.

If not, hold on. You could be in for a bumpy ride.

Researchers at Columbia University have found that children in two-parent households with a poor relationship with their father are 68 per cent more likely to smoke, drink or use drugs compared to all teens in two-parent households.

Teens in single-mother households fared worse; they had a 30 per cent higher risk than those in all two-parent households.

And it is worse for boys.

Young Australian males from broken homes are more likely to commit crimes and go on to become serious offenders than females (though girls are closing the gap).

Boys are crying out for strong role models, and when dad is absent (or loosely present), boys struggle harder to work out what being a man is all about. Enter grandfathers, uncles, teachers, coaches, youth group leaders and other mentors who can be trusted.

Consider the pivotal role of Robin Williams’ characters in the 1989 film Dead Poets Society and 1997’s Good Will Hunting in improving the self-esteem, prospects and happiness of boys.

It’s sobering to learn, from Raising Boys author Steve Biddulph, that 30 per cent of Australian men don’t speak to their father; 30 per cent have a hostile relationship; 30 per cent go through the motions of being a good son (hello, Father’s Day); and only 10 per cent are friends with their dad and see him as a source of emotional support.

The only way is up.

Governments and communities must invest more time and resources in helping men parent more effectively and to relate better to boys in their charge.

Women must encourage and enable the good men in their lives to shine, be they adults or children.

—————-

langk@qnp.newsltd.com.au

The Family law changes / de-reforms are only to legalise the corruption that is rife in the courts now today and for past decades, If Gillard and the women’s power group get their Family law passed I see devastation for kids and dads.

The obvious and overwhelming for many men, discrimination and abuse in and around the court WITH NO ACCOUNTABILITY and NO GOVERNING COMMISSION, proves the Australian courts have failed. The Australian family courts have failed to uphold the Australian laws failed their primary mandate to deliver in the interest of children, and it has deliberately failed, acting out of feminist policies and not acting on Australian law, the courts now are a failure, a farce and a fraud.

When feminist women’s power groups are “unwilling to accept or permit the possibility of a true relationship of fundamental equality to exist” (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War) this is the case in the Australian courts today and has been this way for decades, we are at war with the feminists, not of our choosing.

The rule of law fails when the courts fail and the government fails to deliver equality and justice to the common people again we are at war not of our choosing, but a war thrust on us by the courts and the Australian government administration failures.

“The attempt to establish or maintain domination and to avoid equality is a precipitating
 factor in all wars, i.e., one group wishing to dominate another. Attempts at domination are also often the primary precipitating factor in individual one-on-one violence outside of the context of war, i.e., one individual attempting to dominate another. ” (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War)

www.fathersunionaustralia.com

“Men do not mirror themselves in running water, they mirror themselves in still water. Only what is still can still the stillness of other things.” http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Inner_peace

MEDIA RELEASE

The Gillard Labor Government supports extortion and single parent families. A Bill called the Family Law Legislation Amendment (Family Violence and Other Measures) Bill 2011 is currently before Parliament.

The Bill has recently received the support of the Senate Legal and Constitutional Affairs Committee. The Senate Committee’s Report on the Bill was tabled in the Senate on Monday 22 August 2011 (Hansard page 74).

There are two (2) parts to the Bill.

Firstly, there is a broadening of the definition of what is deemed to be “family violence”. The refusal to hand over your credit card to your wife, husband or partner will constitute “family violence”. At the same time, penalties for providing false information are to be removed from the Family Law Act 1975 (it is noted this later item is specifically not supported by the Coalition Senators in the Senate Report).

This will lead to extortion.

Secondly, the wording of the Bill will legislatively lift “family violence” above the need of children to see both parents after either divorce or separation.

The proportion of one-person households increased from 15.7 per cent of households in the 1976 Census to 24.4 per cent in the 2006 Census. The proportion of two-person households also increased from 28.1 per cent of households in 1976 to 34.1 per cent in 2006 (ABS 2010 Year Book).

The Bill, if passed, will result in false allegations of family violence. This will then further contribute to the increase in one-person and two-person households in Australia.

We only have to look at the recent British riots to see what problems this will cause.

John Flanagan                                                                                                   Deputy Registered Officer,                                                                                                                    Non-Custodial Parents Party (Equal Parenting). http://www.equalparenting.org.au/                                          noncustod@yahoo.com.au

MEDIA RELEASE – FRIDAY 2ND SEPT – FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

A father’s day gift from Labor and the Greens: increased fatherlessness.

Virtually every major social pathology has been linked to fatherlessness: violent crime, drug and alcohol abuse, truancy, teen pregnancy, suicide – all correlate more strongly to fatherlessness than to any other single factor.

The majority of prisoners, juvenile detention inmates, high school dropouts, pregnant teenagers, adolescent murderers and rapists all come from fatherless homes. The connection is so strong that controlling for fatherlessness erases the relationships between race and crime and between low income and crime.

Many commentators, including the British Prime Minister, David Cameron, have laid the blame for the recent UK riots at least partially on the fact that many of the rioters were raised in homes without their fathers present.

Men’s Health Australia spokesman Greg Andresen said today, “The Labor government is set to pass a bill over the coming weeks that will raise already high levels of fatherlessness to record levels with untold impact not just on vulnerable children denied the right to see their fathers; not just on fathers who will most likely end up depressed and suicidal after being denied the right to see their children; but on the greater fabric of Australian society.”

Mr Andresen went on to say that the Family Law Legislation Amendment (Family Violence and Other Measures) Bill 2011, if passed in its current form, would:

• increase child homicide rates (in NSW child homicide had reduced by almost 50% since the introduction of the soon to be reversed 2006 reforms)

• give an open license to parents – mostly mothers – who wish to fabricate allegations of violence and abuse as a legal strategy to remove fathers from their children’s lives (by removing the penalties available for the court to discourage false allegations)

• facilitate the practice of parental alienation, whereby one parent – mostly mothers – alienates the child(ren) from the other parent (by removing the law’s “friendly parent” provisions)

• facilitate and reward family violence by increasing the serious social abuse of denying children and one of their parents the right to a relationship

• fail to protect children from abuse and neglect by defining only “serious” psychological harm or neglect as being against the law

• increase litigation and costs for separating families and taxpayers (the soon to be reversed 2006 Family Law changes had led to a 20% reduction in litigation).

The message from the Labor/Green government to fathers and children this father’s day is clear: your relationship doesn’t matter. Happy father’s day!

http://menshealthaustralia.net/files/MHA_Media_Release_FL11.pdf

Media contacts:

Sue Price | admin@mensrights.com.au | 0409 269 621

Warwick Marsh | info@fathersonline.org | 0418 225 212

Greg Andresen | media@menshealthaustralia.net | 0403 813 925

Depression affects one in eight men in their adult lifetime (compared to one in five women). Distressingly, men are four times more likely than women to commit suicide, and three times more likely to develop a substance abuse problem. As Associate Professor Michael Baigent, Board Director for Beyond Blue, explains, depression is more than just a down day. It’s a “constant change from your normal emotions and behaviour, not just a fleeting thought,” he says. With financial pressures on the rise, job insecurity and an increase in divorce rates, alarmingly, these are some of the common triggers that initiate depression. “Of the males who have committed suicide, a high percentage of them have undergone a separation within the previous 12 months,” Baigent says.

What is Depression

“Depression is a psychiatric disorder where your mood is different to what it normally is, and is so severe that it affects your social and occupational functionality,” Baigent explains. “You may have little enjoyment in life, a loss of appetite and weight loss, difficulty sleeping, lack of energy. You may have suicidal thoughts and or inability to concentrate and function at work,” he says. And although medication, alcohol or amphetamines can contribute to feelings of depression, if you’re not on or taking anything, and still feeling blue, then it’s time to see your doctor.

Speak to your doctor

According to Dr Ronald McCoy, Spokesperson for the Royal Australian College of General Practitioners, a male patient may visit a doctor for help with depression, though they make it difficult for the doctor to diagnose. “[Men] mask it by presenting to the GP with another health complaint,” he says. “With men, it can take a while before they’ll start talking about how they’re feeling, so it’s important to create a safe environment. The GP may ask about their feelings in general, how they’re sleeping, sex life and check for noticeable weight loss or gain,” he says.

To diagnose depression, the doctor will perform an assessment of biological and psychological tests. “Your GP knows you medically and personally, so they’re aware of what’s ‘normal’ for you,” says Baigent. “Some feelings of depression may be caused by anaemia (lack of iron), a thyroid or other physical problems. If your GP feels that you do display the symptoms of depression, then they’ll most likely refer you to a psychologist or therapist,” he says.

What can you do?

The first step is to seek help. “If you don’t feel comfortable talking to somebody else yet, then do some research: online or books are good places to start,” says Baigent. “Speak to your GP or a mental health worker. Remember that feeling depressed is not a personality flaw. It can happen to anybody, at any time, and there are ways to treat it,” he says.

The biggest problem in dealing with male depression isn’t how to prevent or cure it, but how to get men to admit they’re feeling down. “Men are less likely to see themselves as depressed and to seek treatment,” says Baigent.

Is it all doom and gloom?

Adam Garoni, CEO and co-founder of Movember, the charity that raises money and awareness for prostate cancer and male depression, says men are becoming more open about their health and emotions. “For many men who have taken part [in Movember] it’s been the first time they’ve told their mates that they’ve suffered from, or are suffering from, depression,” Garoni says. Last year, during the month of Movember, 40 per cent of men who participated in the fundraiser consulted their GP regarding their health. Around 40 per cent also recommended a friend to visit their doctor. “It’s about looking after your mates as well as yourself, and removing the stigma of depression. If these guys aren’t having that conversation with their mates or Dad, then it spirals out of control,” he says.

How to spot the signs

“If you notice any behavioural changes that last for more than two weeks in family members, friends or yourself, then it is worth asking if depression is the cause,” says Baigent.

Signs of depression include:

• Uncharacteristic moodiness, irritability or frustration
• Spending less time with friends and family
• Loss of interest in food, sex, exercise or other pleasurable activities
• Sleeplessness
• Increased alcohol and drug use
• Staying home from work or school without reason
• Increased physical health complaints
• Recklessness or taking unnecessary risks

For more information visit www.beyondblue.org.au

Read our fact sheet on Male depression.

By Charmaine Yabsley

Miranda Devine THE reaction to my column last week  pointing out the perils of a fatherless society is a case study in how  intimidation, vilification, distortion and outright lies are being used  in an attempt to silence unfashionable opinions.

These are the tactics of a new “politically correct McCarthyism”.

In this case gay marriage was the sacred cow that so unhinged people.

The  column was respectful of Finance Minister Penny Wong and her female  partner, who is expecting a baby, and stated that “love conquers all”,  but its assertion that fathers are in general better for children was  beyond the pale for some.

I wrote that Wong and her partner will  no doubt be “fine mothers” providing their baby with “a stable, loving  upbringing, despite not having a father in the home. Individually, these  things work themselves out. Allowances are made, extra effort applied.  Love conquers all”.

On Twitter, people twisted my words, and claimed my column said:  “love conquers all (unless you’re gay)” when it said the precise  opposite.

“I have never felt so much anger towards someone,” was one comment.

“Shame we can’t autocorrect your mind,” was another.

The escalating rage was justified because I was somehow pushing gay teens to suicide, they claimed.

It  was performance rage, played out on social media and low-rent blogs  looking for more hits. But privately, to the email address at the bottom  of the column, hundreds of quite different messages flooded in.

The  column also said that same-sex marriage proponents should not be  “cynically using” the pregnancy as a weapon. And further that the choice  of two lesbians to relegate a father to the sidelines ought not be  celebrated as if it were some major milestone in human civilisation.

The  reason is because as a society we need to uphold the crucial role of  fathers, with the London riots a “manifestation of a fatherless  society”.

Critics then twisted my words, claiming I wrote: “People in London are rioting because Penny Wong is having a baby.”

It  is hard not to draw the conclusion that denizens of social media are  cerebrally challenged. Were they too lazy to read the original column,  or do they lack comprehension skills. Are they so entrenched in their  own beliefs they can’t tolerate another point of view. Are they  paranoid? Or are they just dishonest?

Sydney Morning Herald  blogger John Birmingham retitled my column: “Miranda Devine’s Lesbian  Mums Caused the London Riots”. The Crikey blog had former Democrats  senator Brian Greig call me “News Limited’s Catholic columnist” and  allege that I had “tried to pin the London riots on lesbian mothers”.

Straw men were constructed, and suddenly people were abusing me for a column I had not written but which they insisted I had.

On  ABC-TV’s Q&A on Monday night came an extraordinary question from an  audience member who said: “The criticism of Senator Wong is based on  the homophobic idea that a child is entitled to having both a father and  a mother.”

So there you have it. It is homophobic to say a child is entitled to a mother and a father.

Yet not one person on the panel could find the courage to knock the assertion on the head.

On  Facebook someone published a list of my Facebook friends on a page  called: “Stopping psychotic extremists who want to kill minorities”.  Inviting people to bully and harass my Facebook friends is this person’s  way of trying to silence an opinion he (or she) doesn’t like.

A  cursory glance at these rage-flecked responses offers an insight into  the illiberal mindset of those who pretend to demand tolerance. Or  rather ram it down our throats. This is not tolerance but jackboot  totalitarianism, the tyranny of the minority.

Jackie Stricker, the  lesbian partner of Dr Kerryn Phelps, wrote a letter to this newspaper  calling for me to receive “urgent counselling” and saying my columns  shouldn’t be published.

That’s right. Let’s censor the unfashionable opinions, especially those held by the mainstream.

If  people such as Stricker think their intemperate foot-stomping will stop  people holding these opinions they are wrong. The extraordinary thing  is that the opinion I expressed was unremarkable. It is being echoed all  over Britain right now, in the aftermath of the London riots, including  by Prime Minister David Cameron.

He described the riots as a  “wake-up call” to the “slow-motion moral collapse that has taken place  in parts of our country these past few generations”.

“Children  without fathers. Schools without discipline. Reward without effort.  Crime without punishment. Rights without responsibilities. Communities  without control.

“The question people asked over and over again  last week was ‘Where are the parents?’ …Tragically that’s been  followed in some cases by judges rightly lamenting: ‘Why don’t the  parents even turn up when their children are in court?’ Well, join the  dots and you have a clear idea about why some of these young people were  behaving so terribly. Either there was no one at home, they didn’t much  care or they’d lost control. Families matter. I don’t doubt that many  of the rioters out last week have no father at home. Perhaps they come  from one of the neighbourhoods where it’s standard for children to have a  mum and not a dad, where it’s normal for young men to grow up without a  male role model, looking to the streets for their father figures,  filled up with rage and anger.”

The Daily Express points out that  in neighbourhoods such as Tottenham, where the rioting started, “up to  four in five families have no father living with them. This  fatherlessness is the single most destructive factor in modern society”.

The  facts, in study after study, are unequivocal. The Express quotes from  the British think tank Civitas: Fatherless children are “more likely to  engage in behaviour associated with social exclusion, such as offending,  teenage pregnancy, alcohol and drug abuse or worklessness.”

Children  living without their biological fathers are more likely to live in  poverty, have more trouble in school, and are at greater risk of  suffering physical, emotional or sexual abuse. Fatherless boys are twice  as likely to be in prison by their early 30s.

In the middle of  the furore this week came an email from a friend, who grew up on a  public housing estate in western Sydney and has spent much of his career  trying to right the many problems he saw there.

“Anyone who  thinks a cadre of fatherless children is good for society,” he wrote,  “has never set foot in a public housing estate.”

Pointing out that  fathers are important is not homophobic. Nor is it an indictment of  individual single mothers, many of whom do a heroic job. But to pretend  that a fatherless society is not a disaster doesn’t delete the truth.

devinemiranda@hotmail.com

Miranda Devine

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/70sh3B/www.articlesaboutmen.com/2011/08/fatherless-society-a-disaster-for-our-children-911/

Australia needs a true democracy Published by Jeanette on Aug 16, 2011

Target: Prime Minister Julia Gillard  Parliament House Canberra

was a Welsh social reformer and one of the founders of socialism and the cooperative movement.

www.fathersunionaustralia.com

Owen’s son Robert Dale stayed at New Harmony after its collapse. He had a different assessment of his father’s experiment. “All cooperative schemes which provide equal remuneration to the skilled and industrious and the ignorant and idle must work their own downfall, for by this unjust plan … they must of necessity eliminate the valuable members … and retain only the improvident, unskilled, and vicious.”

Owen, Robert Dale, 1801–77, American social reformer, b. Scotland; son of Robert Owen/

History shows bureaucracies are socialist in structure and psychopathic by nature, always denigrate to the lowest possible standards, inevitably corrupt and dysfunctional, simply because their positions are fixed with no accountability or open to competition, as is the real world. There are two opposing forces at work the idle and destructive and the productive and creative, the idle and destructiven pool in bureaucracies.

This is why governments throughout history perpetrate atrocities on the innocent like what is happening in the Australian Family courts and throughout Australian government departments.

Bureaucracies are little more than life time jobs for psychopath’s with little or no accountability.

It is vital to remove corrupt and incompetent individuals at the earliest opportunity, it simply isn’t happening.

It is essential to move to open competition, for government positions and take every advantage of free market’s tender enterprise for all public services.

Any governance that realises this will excel. Australia needs and deserves the best of the best. Administration needs to be a true free market, open to competition for jobs and services, based on short term contract.

All Australians are entitled to freedom of speech, association, assembly, religion, movement, honesty and truth.

“All truth passes through three stages: First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.”

Arthur Schopenhauer

Don’t be evil.

Raubwirtschaft (German for “plunder economy,” “robber economy,” or “rapine”) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raubwirtschaft

Kleptocracy, alternatively cleptocracy or kleptarchy, is a term applied to a government subject to control fraud that takes advantage of governmental corruption to extend the personal wealth and political power of government officials and the ruling class (collectively, kleptocrats),

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kleptocracy

Walking on The Sun. by Smashmouth

Leave comments if you like, TC.